Sunday, May 10, 2015

Odd Spot #122

I Odd Spot #122 brought to you by Libra.

'Dolphins sleep with one eye open' as should the future owner of this little treasure at the op shop. There may even be gripping of a pillow while those flaccid, blue intestines/waves lurk in the mind's eye.

Friday, April 24, 2015

No fuss pesto

My letter to the manufacturer:

'I tried the new basil stir through pesto tonight. It was awful from the first mouthful. I had to add other things to it to make my dinner palatable. I wish I had just made my own pesto like I usually do. This pesto of yours is sweet and pesto should not be sweet at all.

There should not be any sugar in a pesto. Traditional recipes don't have it. As a refridgerated product you certainly don't need it. Even the non-refridgerated jars of pestos on the market aren't remotely sweet. Your product has over two teaspoons of sugar in each tub. That's more than most people put in a coffee. That's also more than there is salt and garlic in your product. Utterly wrong!

Unlike your other products, I would not buy or recommend this product to anyone.'

[edit 27/4/2015] To compensate for my unsatisfactory gastronomical experience, the manufacturer has offered to send me a coupon for the supermarket of my chosing.

No Fuss Pasta Pesto

I've made pesto for pasta enough times to be able to just throw it together without measurements, knowing it will be delicious. It's usually ready before my pasta is!

Cobble together these ingredients to a taste and texture you like, grinding in your mortar and pestle in the following order :
  • Fresh basil leaves - also works with fresh oregano, roughly chopped, about a handful to serve two
  • Freshly ground salt and pepper
  • Garlic cloves - roughly chopped
  • Pinenuts or other nuts - I usually have salted, roasted cashews on hand so I reduce the ground salt added. Peanuts also work well.
Now, get a little rubber or silicone spatula - never a metal implement, it will scratch the mortar- and mix in:
  • Parmesan cheese - traditionally, but whatever hard cheese you have to hand will do in a pinch
  • Olive oil - enough to turn the mixture into a paste
All you need is a mortar and pestle and you too can make your own. Yes you can do it in a processor but I suspect it will be a little different because you're cutting rather than crushing the ingredients. I recommend a granite mortar and pestle with a 12cm diameter on the mortar's inner bowl. It seems to be the optimum size: for speedy results on a good quantity; by not being too cumbersome to pick up off the bench and cradle if that's how you wish to grind; being easy to gently put in the sink and manipulate to wash. Always hand wash. Dark granite is better than marble because it won't stain.

Saturday, March 07, 2015

Fuzzy Spiced Apple Punch

Fruit punch 'recipe'. Like most party punch, this was cobbled together to taste and it did please my guests muchly.
In a punch bowl or similar combine the following:
Ginger wine infused with cinnamon*
Apple juice
Diet dry ginger ale
Soda water to reduce sweetness if needed
Muddled apple mint leaves

*In a clean bottle or jar, place 2 cups of ginger wine with a whole stick of cinnamon. Store in a dark place to infuse for about a month.

Oven Baked Falafel Recipe

I have adapted more than one online falafel recipe to arrive at one of my own. It was so popular at my last party that I promised to share the recipe with my guests. It went as follows:

Oven Baked Falafels

2 cups dried chickpeas
1 small brown onion, roughly chopped
1/4 cup fresh parsley,
3-5 cloves garlic
1 1/2 tbsp flour
1 3/4 tsp salt
1/4 tsp pepper
2 tsp ground cumin
1 tsp ground coriander
1/4 tsp cayenne pepper
a pinch of ground cardamon
1 1/2 tbsp tahini
sesame seeds to garnish or roll in to taste
olive oil (optional)

Soak the chickpeas overnight in cold water.
Drain well.
Combine all ingredients in a food processor.
Set aside for 30 minutes to develop flavours.
Preheat oven to 220°C.
Line two baking trays with baking paper.
Use a teaspoon to scoop mixture, and roll into slightly flattened balls. Place directly onto baking paper - or onto a plate first if you're not sure about spacing.
Garnish with a pinch of sesame seeds - gently pat into the surface on top. Or, roll in sesame seeds if you are that way inclined!
Optional: spray lightly with olive oil. I use a refillable atomiser. The oil adds extra flavour and helps them brown up nicely, but you will still get a reasonable result without it.
Bake for 20 minutes or until golden brown.
Serve hot with dips. Hommus, tzatziki and aioli are harmonious combinations with these falafels.
Serve cold in a vegetarian/salad sandwich in place of meat.
Can be frozen.

Friday, March 06, 2015

Free green submarine

According to my research, I'm not the only who sees it.

 photo FreeTramGreenSub_zps9dwd3ojc.jpg

We tram for free in a green submarine [tram bell] *ding ding*
A green submarine *ding ding*
Free green submarine.

Tuesday, February 24, 2015

Why is Mr Happy so?

Why is Mr Happy so? Did he help the others to freedom via The Claw and this altruism warmed his little yellow cockles? Is it because he is finally alone and has some space to himself? Is it because it's all about him now and he loves that? The mind boggles.

He was my favorite Mr Man as a child.

Saturday, February 07, 2015

Why you should ignore what's fashionable

Denim on denim is distressing whilst someone might be auditioning for a dwarf role in the Hobbit. No visible neck, bushy beard and stumpy looking legs check!

Sullen uncordinated/preppy look

Monday, February 02, 2015

Bushy beards

I'm not a fan of the current fashion for a bushy beard. It makes young men look like much older men, collects food, reduces the prominence of strong cheekbones and jawline and the sensual upper lip. Looking  through  the latest Myer fashion catalogue yesterday I surprised to find a big beard on one of the models. Looking at the edge of his cheek bones and big brown eyes peering out from that wilderness, there appeared to potentially be an attractive man there - but we will never know because all we can see is his damn beard! [/rant]